Cassandra Snow

Compassionate. Practical. Radical.

Quickie Relationship/Crush/Friendship Check In

Relationships are tough, but so much of the advice I give ends up advising people AGAINST overanalyzing and thinking things to death. There are several spreads to check in with various relationships that are 7-10 cards (or more), but often what "solves" the problem is a quick, sudden insight, so I designed a simple, four card spread instead. This way if the issue is a simple one of communication, insecurity, or decision-making, we trust our intuition and cut to the heart of the matter. It looks like this:

Lay down the spread in this order: 1) Your left, 2) your right, 3)center top, 4)center bottom

Lay down the spread in this order: 1) Your left, 2) your right, 3)center top, 4)center bottom

The spread is so simple, as promised. The two on the sides represent where each party is in general in their lives. The one on your left is YOU and where you are right now in life. The one on your right is where the other party you're inquiring about is. This placement is important even when dealing with a soul mate, twin sister, or someone you're building a life with, you are still dealing with two individuals, and advising as if you are one entity can do more harm than good and open the doors to co-dependence and a host of other not-helpful behaviors. In addition to showing where each party is, the sides also show what aspects of yourself, your identity, and your individuality you are bringing into the relationship the strongest, for better or worse.

The card on top is where the relationship is currently headed. This is the outcome if nothing changes. If it's a positive outcome, then sometimes knowing things are ending up well is enough to pull us through the slump. If not, then we use our final card, which is our card of advice, to turn the energy back to the way it's supposed to be, or to cope and communicate effectively to stay on track. If the current outcome is NOT desirable, then that advice card is obviously about how to turn it around to get a different result, or how to cope if the reading shows the relationship really shouldn't continue.

It should go without saying, but just in case, this spread can be used in ANY kind of relationship--if you're fighting with a parent, a boss, or a friend, it is every bit as effective. I've done several test runs, and it works out as often as my other favorites.

Enjoy, and please report back if you have any feedback or ideas.

Blessed be!